Spinning a Web

He'd been in town maybe 2 months for a new job when I met him. The first night all he talked about was my accent. Said it was the best accent he had ever heard come out of a mouth. I have a slight, raspy drawl that becomes more pronounced when I drink. Drinking is exactly what I had been doing this night. I called him because my roommate had gone out with some senior citizen and I was pissed off. As he drove up the hill of my driveway, his headlights hit me. I was sitting at the top of the hill. Cell phone in one hand. Cigarette in the other. Three-fourths empty bottle of wine between my legs. I briefly thought to myself "Wonder if I can get laid?" What can I say? I was drunk and sometimes I think like a man.

He was listening to the Old 97's when he drove up. For the first 30 minutes I wouldn't let him get out of the car. I kept trying to sing along to the CD and asking him over and over why the fuck he would move away from California. I just sat in the driveway while he sat in the truck with the door open and laughed his ass off at me. He tried to explain why he was in my town but I was having none of it. I was convinced no sane person would ever move there. Even for a short time.

When the bottle was empty it was time to go inside. I had decided I was going to teach him how to avoid the traps of a southern girl. We were going to be friends. So I explained to him that southern girls were looking for husbands even as they professed they weren't. It did matter what car he drove, job he had, clothes he wore. I likened them to spiders spinning a web. Southern girls act so sweet and innocent but it's all a game. Of course, the whole time I professed that I wasn't the typical southern girl. Now I admit I have walls. I'm cynical. It's all a front but I was putting up my best front with him. I do that with all new people. Protect myself at all cost.


We put a movie in the VCR but ended up talking about all sorts of things. I kept staring at his mouth while we talked. He had the best lips. They looked so perfectly kissable. I thought I might be able to kiss him for hours if I was given the chance. I looked at the clock eventually and it was 4:00 a.m. My roommate still wasn't home. I thought The Boy should go home but somehow I couldn't ask him to leave. I wanted to talk to him. I wanted him to listen to me. At some point during the night I laid my head down on the couch and started rubbing his arm. Like it was the most natural thing in the world. The human contact almost drove me over the edge. I'd seen this boy twice in my life and I was acting like we had known each other for years. My simple, light touch was one of the most innocent yet seductive things I felt like I had ever done. I hadn't meant for it to be sexual but it felt that way to me.

He told his whole history that night. I laughed at him a lot. He said I had a laugh you couldn't get away from. And eyes that you could get lost in. I laughed plenty that night too. I tried to be a great listener. I wanted him to feel like what he had to say was important. It was important to me that he feel special. I couldn't figure out just why.

He finally left at around 5:30 when I said I had to go to sleep. I walked him downstairs and out to the truck. He leaned down and kissed me on the cheek. I wanted more. I walked back up the stairs with a smile on my face. As I lay in bed I replayed the whole evening. The way he looked at me. The sound of his voice. The color of his eyes. That sweet kiss on the cheek. I thought about the things I had said. And done. The way I had acted. I realized, almost shamefully, that I had been spinning a web. The only problem was I had also flown into a pretty big damn web myself.